Exact Approximations

Monday, October 24, 2005

A Case of the Mondays

I am feeling worthless at work. I don't feel incompetent or anything. Rather, I feel that The Boss is not really taking advantage of my presence. Bottom line - I could be doing more, taking on more responsibility. Instead, I feel like a member of an award-winning YesMen team whose purpose is to tell The Boss how great he is. Don't get me wrong, The Boss is great. He is a brilliant man who can make a really bad fact for the plaintiffs look like a defense admission of liability. But I sense that he not only likes to be the ringleader, but likes to do everything in the ring. The smallest of motions, the simplest of phone calls....

I don't mind this so much, because I am the same way. There are few things I would love more than the opportunity to take a case from the ground up - do the interviews, the depositions, find the experts, write the limines, appear at the trial status conferences. Everything. My problem is that I am starting to wonder why he hired me. I could produce much more than I do, but it seems like the majority of my workload is reading up on cases - flipping through depo after depo. Reading minute entry after minute entry. Reviewing correspondence file after correspondence file. My purpose is to be the guy on the side who can chime in with a quick "so and so said blah blah blah" and "It was Defendant X's expert who made that statement, not Defendant Y's." And the ever-abundant "Wow, great way to get defense counsel bench-slapped" "Nice line of questioning on their expert's LSD dissertation research."

How long should a person wait before either quitting or going to The Boss? I've been thinking of going to The Boss for a couple of weeks with my complaints, but then I got all sick and pilled out on pain meds. Maybe not the best time to initiate a "What the fuck is the problem?" talk with the guy who signs my paychecks. I am not convinced that such a confrontation would go over well. Finally, I can't really afford to get fired without something lined up. And, short of the neighboring firm who might well give me a job if I just walk through those doors.... I don't have fall-back job yet.

The thing is - I want to work here. The first successful case we had that I was around for left me with an incredible feeling of pride. I actually cried. A lot. I believe in the cases we take and that is quite a luxury I don't want to forget. At the same time, I don't want another two months to pass and continue to feel disposable. More importantly, I don't want another two months to pass and continue to feel that I am no more experienced and capable than I was when I began this job.

*sigh*

5 Comments:

  • I don't know anything about how you all get cases, but is there any way you could either bring a case in the door yourself or intercept one? That way, you could go to Boss Man with a well-thought out management plan and ask him if you could take this one on yourself. You could tell him that you would feed it and walk it and he would never have to clean up after it, pleasepleaseplease.

    I find that when you want to ask for more responsibility, it usually helps if you can present Authority Figure with a detailed plan of what you would do. That makes them think more carefully. Anyone can say no to a vague request. It's quite another thing to say no to a well-drawn proposal.

    Good luck!

    By Blogger -Ann, at 10:26 PM  

  • E..e...excuse me, did you take my stapler?

    By Blogger Arbusto, at 7:41 AM  

  • Heehee - I totally used to have an Office Space shirt that said "Excuse me, I believe you have my stapler."

    I lost that in the divorce...

    By Blogger Lex Fori, at 2:19 PM  

  • Yea, it's always a tough call to know when to go to the Boss with a particular problem to bitch about. Someone told me the best way to do it is to throw a few "suck-up" lines at him [you know, "I love this firm," etc.] and then hit him with a "but, I think I could be better utilized if...flah flah flah...." My problem is I wouldn't get through that sentence without vomiting. Also, lawyers are supposed to be above all that bullshit.

    By Blogger Christopher G. Anderson, at 9:39 AM  

  • Chris, you just made me feel so appreciated with "flah flah flah." I can now die in peace.

    By Blogger Arbusto, at 4:33 PM  

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