Loving My New Employment Anxiety

I spent my entire Sunday reviewing disclosure statements of Defendant Bad Doctor, looking for inconsistencies, slip-ups - anything making for the appearance of shady-lawyering. As if that needs proof. Stuff was found and a mean letter was written. The Boss has this great way of nicely telling opposing counsel they are complete idiots, incapable of following simple rules of procedure and likely subject to sanctions. Then he signs the letter "Very Truly Yours." Highly effective comedy.

My assignments are piling up and the chances of finishing before my Thursday surgery become slimmer with each passing hour. I need to call my doctor and ask some pre-op questions. Here is what I have so far:

• "Can I have 8 different color highlighters, 4 fountain pens, 12 depositions and a laptop in the recovery room?"
• "If I am still coughing up this ucky green phlegm, can we harvest some of the thickest, grossest stuff - and send it to my ex Mother-In-Law? You know, for fun? There will be NO rescheduling. I don't care how high my white blood count gets. I've got someone else's tight schedule to live by here."
• Is there any way you can wake me early, pump me full of amphetamine-based meds and get me working again by 6:00p the day of surgery?
• Would you call The Boss afterwards and tell him I was the most successful patient you've ever had, and you expect I should never get sick again throughout not only my lifetime but also that of my spawn?"

That's it so far. Am I missing anything important?