Here a God, There a God, Everywhere a God, God...
Enough is enough. I have been officially assaulted by Christ, Joseph-Landers and God-References.
I was pushed over the edge today upon learning that Gwyneth Paltrow had her 2nd kid, and beat out the oddity of Apple by naming him Moses.
But I was already walking a fine line. It started last week when Daughter began asking questions about God and Heaven and Hell. When Daughter was five, she proclaimed Atheism, after a friend got mad at her for not believing in Shiva. And another for not being Muslim. And another for not believing in Jesus. Ah, the glory of raising a child in Berkeley. "I don't believe in God. It doesn't make sense mommy, that so many people could be wrong."
I was so proud of my genius.
Now, we live in Red-State Jesus-Land. All of Daughter's friends believe in God. The same (basic) God. Heaven, Hell and the Bible. Daughter feels like the outcast because she is the only one who doesn't go to church. Daughter knows that Mom thinks Religion is bullshit. Daughter is afraid that if she doesn't believe in God, she will end up in Hell. Scare-tactics... brilliant.
As an aside, I also got into a disagreement with a co-worker. Explaining that I would rather be a politician than a lawyer, I noted that it could never be. A teenage-out-of-wedlock-former-addict-raging-atheist is unelectable. Her response?
The topic of conversation changed after that.
Anyhow, so Daughter wants to know all about God. She wants to go to church. She wants to read the Bible. All of which I encouraged her to do. I figure if I try to shield her from the insanity of religion, it will be like the sweet, sweet forbidden fruit and next thing I know she'll be Mormon and on a mission... I sooooo don't want her going down this misguided path, but I figure I have to let her see the road and decide that it is the journey of illogic. Right?
So I gave her a copy of the Bible. Also the Koran. She needs equal exposure. After that will be the Dead Sea Scrolls and the new book of Judas. The Banker has offered to take her to church and I agreed that is fine - just requested that they mix up the types of churches. One Sunday with the Catholics oughta bore Daughter, at least Agnostic...
Daughter asked me and Boyfriend to read the Bible with her. We all sat in her bed, and there I was, reading the God damned Bible, trying to make it interesting, emphasizing voices. We got to the rib of man and people started begatting.
Wow. I never, ever thought I would be saying that I read my kid the Bible.
I pray so hard this will pass.
Eee-Yi-Eee-Yi-Ohhh... no.
I was pushed over the edge today upon learning that Gwyneth Paltrow had her 2nd kid, and beat out the oddity of Apple by naming him Moses.
But I was already walking a fine line. It started last week when Daughter began asking questions about God and Heaven and Hell. When Daughter was five, she proclaimed Atheism, after a friend got mad at her for not believing in Shiva. And another for not being Muslim. And another for not believing in Jesus. Ah, the glory of raising a child in Berkeley. "I don't believe in God. It doesn't make sense mommy, that so many people could be wrong."
I was so proud of my genius.
Now, we live in Red-State Jesus-Land. All of Daughter's friends believe in God. The same (basic) God. Heaven, Hell and the Bible. Daughter feels like the outcast because she is the only one who doesn't go to church. Daughter knows that Mom thinks Religion is bullshit. Daughter is afraid that if she doesn't believe in God, she will end up in Hell. Scare-tactics... brilliant.
As an aside, I also got into a disagreement with a co-worker. Explaining that I would rather be a politician than a lawyer, I noted that it could never be. A teenage-out-of-wedlock-former-addict-raging-atheist is unelectable. Her response?
Co-Worker: Perplexed. "You're not really an atheist?"
Lex: Perplexed. "Uh, yeah, I am."
Co-Worker: "It all makes no sense without intelligent creation, why worms would develop eyes."
Lex: Oh really, no way! I never thought of that before! "Evolution makes way more sense to me than assuming the world was created in a matter of days by some big man in the sky. It just all seems a little schizophrenic. Ohhhh - crazy man hears you...."
The topic of conversation changed after that.
Anyhow, so Daughter wants to know all about God. She wants to go to church. She wants to read the Bible. All of which I encouraged her to do. I figure if I try to shield her from the insanity of religion, it will be like the sweet, sweet forbidden fruit and next thing I know she'll be Mormon and on a mission... I sooooo don't want her going down this misguided path, but I figure I have to let her see the road and decide that it is the journey of illogic. Right?
So I gave her a copy of the Bible. Also the Koran. She needs equal exposure. After that will be the Dead Sea Scrolls and the new book of Judas. The Banker has offered to take her to church and I agreed that is fine - just requested that they mix up the types of churches. One Sunday with the Catholics oughta bore Daughter, at least Agnostic...
Daughter asked me and Boyfriend to read the Bible with her. We all sat in her bed, and there I was, reading the God damned Bible, trying to make it interesting, emphasizing voices. We got to the rib of man and people started begatting.
Wow. I never, ever thought I would be saying that I read my kid the Bible.
I pray so hard this will pass.
Eee-Yi-Eee-Yi-Ohhh... no.
posted by Lex Fori at
2:05 PM
7 Comments:
I was just watching "Inherit the Wind" based upon the Scope trial. I love the end with the lawyer on the stand:
"It says God made the earth in a day. But he didn't make the sun until the 4th day. How do they know it was a true 24 hour day? There was no way to tell time."
"It says here that Cain went off into the land of Nod and knew his wife. Where'd she come from? If there was Adam and Eve and Cain and Able, where'd this other woman come from? Ever think of that?"
"And so and so begat so and so2 who begat so and so 3. How'd they do all that begatting? Is it like how people beget today when the begat?"
I do admire the exposure you're giving Daughter. I'm personally a deist and Brooke is a christian. She thinks church is important and I think it's bogus. We'll have some interesting issues.
By
Arbusto, at 6:40 PM
That conversation is too much. Of all the facts one might think to use to support creationism, the idea of worms and eyes is too much. For one thing, it's just not true. For another, it just seems so random.
Anyway, good luck with the kid and religion. If I ever have a kid, that's what I'm dreading most - not so much religion but the general overwhelming desire to fit in. "No sweetie, you can't watch trashy television - you're too good for that."
By
-Ann, at 10:14 PM
I believe in what I call the 3 Truths. You'll be proud to know Lex that I came up with them wholly in the vaccum of myself and they have nothing to do with Christianity. I would say that these thoughts started at around the age of 5 when I sat at the dinner table with my parents and asked them what nothingness was. To me it seemed like something made more sense than nothing because I couldn't wrap my mind around nothing, trying to comprehend it actually made me cry. In 2002, when I was 27, I lived without tv, and literally isloated myself. I just spent all my free time thinking about these kinds of things. I finally arrived on Truth 2 as you'll see below, and everything else followed. It doesn't take faith to believe in these truths as they are based on logic. But, I should say they have nothing to do with Atheism either as I find Christians and Atheists to be very much alike, allow me to explain:
Truth 1
Nothingness can not exist. This is because nothingness is something.
Truth 2
Things can only just be. You can't "go back forever", as some religions would say. And things can't come from nothing because that can't exist. In going backwards in time, you must arrive at a place where things just are.
Truth 3
Everything exists. The place where things just are must be unconscious, because consciousness lives in temporal space. Since this is-ness can't make choices nor "create nothing", everything must be.
So what does this all mean? It means just that, that everything exists. We then see that this life is a something implying everything, instead of just one thing, ie the Christian belief in God or the Atheistic belief in the Big Bang. I can understand why people want all of this to stem back to one thing, because their life seems like only one thing, that makes sense, but again this is just a something implying The Everything.
So you may ask, well if everything exists, we'd have omnipotent forces opposing each other, wouldn't we all "obliviate"? Much like an indestructable object in space which can not be moved, yet moving towards it is an indestructable object on a steady course, which also can not deviate from that course, what happens? Something happens, but because I can not comprehend it, it happens somewhere else. That can then only mean (evidenced by our existence) that our "ultimate state" is to be "omnipotent souls" which coexist infinitely.
Why is this good? Because I have to take responsibilty for my actions, I'm going to have to live with everything I've ever done forever.
By
Anonymous, at 10:48 AM
Is Daughter subscribing to Pascal's Wager?
By
SouthernCanadian, at 11:26 AM
Ooooh, good one.
By
Arbusto, at 2:45 PM
Don't worry about Daughter's sudden interest in religion. This sounds more like a need to fit in with her peers than a need to develop a belief in a religion. Encourage her to explore because it will allow her to learn how to be open minded and tolerant of all belief systems, but don't downplay your views in the process. As for the Bible stories, I wouldn't fret too much about that either. Think of her reading those stories as an early exposure to mythological literature. Try slipping in some Greek, Norse, African, and Native American mythology into her library for alternate viewpoints, along with some Eastern philosophical texts.
If she ever starts answering the question, "How are you today" with "Blessed and anointed," then it's time for some serious deprogramming.
Good luck. I'm sure all will be well.
By
TEM, at 8:31 AM
Tell Daughter this, I'm sure it will be compelling to her because she's so smart:
So God made this garden with some people in it and then told them not to eat some fruit off a certain tree to test and see if they'd be obedient, that's fine, but if he knows everything, than that means he knew what they would do, so how can that be a real test?
Then he said ok, since you ate this fruit, you and all your predecessors will burn in hell unless they repent for what Adam and Eve did in some fashion. He also says that he is love. But this would be like taking a murderer who is to be shot in front of a firing squad for what he has done, also standing with him are his two sons, two daughters and twelve grandchildren, they are also to be shot dead for what he has done. Hm, doesn't seem very loving to me.
But this is all beside the point because since he knows everything he also knows the screams and wails from the bowels of eternal hell of every man woman and child who didn't say the five words "Jesus come into my heart" before they were even born. This includes all the Buddhists, all the Hindus, all the unborn children and children all the tribes and countless others who weren't privy to this "magic phrase". Again, is that love?
By
Anonymous, at 10:44 AM
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